Guess what?
If you hadn’t already guessed by the blatantly obvious ticker at the top of this page, I’M PREGNANT!
I went in for my three month check-up today, and heard the heartbeat. It made the whole thing seem so much more real. There really is a baby in there! Before today, I was afraid of announcing the pregnancy (even to family and friends), because I didn’t really believe it. I thought “What if the home test was wrong, and the doctor made a mistake?” Paranoia. But now, I’m confident. I’m having a baby!
Anyway, I’ve written a few diary entries along the way (okay, only three). I thought I’d post these right now. Take note of the dates on each entry.
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11th May, 2005Well, I’m definitely pregnant! First of all, there’s the fact that my doctor announced yesterday, “Well, you’re definitely pregnant!” There’s also this: I was listening to some CD’s last night, and ‘There Goes My Life’ by Kenny Chesney came on. I cried my eyes out through the whole thing. Uncharacteristically, I might add. I’ve NEVER cried about a song. Darn hormones! But come on, look at these lyrics!
All he could think about was I'm too young for this
Got my whole life ahead
Hell I'm just a kid myself
How'm I gonna raise one
All he could see were his dreams goin' up in smoke
So much for ditchin' this town and hangin' out on the coast
Oh well, those plans are long gone
And he said
There goes my life
There goes my future, my everything
Might as well kiss it all good-bye
There goes my life...
A couple years of up all night and a few thousand diapers later
That mistake he thought he made covers up the refrigerator
Oh yeah, he loves that little girl
Momma's waiting to tuck her in
As she fumbles up those stairs
She smiles back at him dragging that teddy bear
Sleep tight, blue eyes and bouncin' curls
He smiles…
There goes my life
There goes my future, my everything
I love you, daddy good-night
There goes my life
She had that Honda loaded down
With Abercrombie clothes and 15 pairs of shoes and his American Express
He checked the oil and slammed the hood, said your good to go
She hugged them both and headed off to the West Coast
And he cried
There goes my life
There goes my future, my everything
I love you
Baby good-bye
There goes my life
There goes my life
Baby good-bye---------------------------
29th May, 2005I’ve learnt something about pregnancy – the word ‘hungry’ ceases to exist. It is replaced by ‘starving’! I’ll just suddenly get extremely starving, and have to eat right then and there. This happens all the time. Like last night, I started feeling that starving feeling, and I decided to make some popcorn (all the while hunched over from hunger pangs). After what seemed like forever, the popcorn was ready, and I wolfed it down. But little NJ (short for Nuske Junior) didn’t like the popcorn, and I vomited it all back up again. That was the first time I’ve actually vomited. Cool, hey! I was like “Man, that’s a lot of popcorn”. It looked like a spice paste I saw on a TV cooking show. But anyway, I felt better after that, and quite happily ate some freshly-baked Anzac biscuits.
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20th June, 2005I cried at work today. I’m having a lot of trouble feeling alright about sending my child to daycare from two months old. There’s nothing I would like more than to be a stay-at-home mum. But in my situation, that’s what has to happen. I have to work, because Tim’s job alone won’t be able to support us. And there’s no-one who would be able to look after the baby for us for three days a week. It’s so frustrating, because I really don’t want it to happen like this, but there’s nothing I can do about it.
I really feel like a bad mother, and I’m not even technically a mother yet! I feel like I’m abandoning my baby, even if it is only for three days a week.
I told Mum how I feel, and she sent me this email:
Dear Alyssa,
I can understand your frustration and concern. Anything can happen between now and when bub is due. Just tell God what you want and trust that whatever happens will be for the best.
I was fortunate enough to be able to stay home while you kids were little, but lots of mum's these days don't have that opportunity. But like I said anything is possible.......... Don't stress about it everything will be ok. TRUST( all things are possible) love from mama.Yep, that made me cry even more. But she’s right. I should just trust God. He’s in charge, and everything will work out for the best.
*Update* -A- from
A Mother’s Work Is Never Done sent me the most awesome email. I totally feel more at ease about the daycare issue. She rocks. :o)
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Since I spoke about vomit in my second entry, I’m going to talk about it again here. Let me tell you
the WORST thing to throw up: Fast food. Oh my goodness. The worst. EVER. So much so, that I have vowed never to eat fast food again. Don’t even try it. If you think you may throw up in the near future, stay away from fast food. FAR AWAY.
Okay, that’s enough for now. I can finally start posting regularly again, because I can talk about babies. That’s really all that’s been on my mind lately, understandably. :o)
Changes.
I made a not-so-subtle change to my blog. Notice anything different?
Hint: Look up.
Zzzzzz.
I am SO tired. I was just sitting here, doing my work, when BOOM! The tiredness just knocked me over the head. Now I am struggling to keep awake. I am going to ask my husband (very nicely) if he can please drive home, and then I’m going to have a snooze in the car. That luxury is two hours away, though. Must keep myself busy until then. Help!
Still can't believe it.
I led a song at church music practise last night!!! Woohoo! It was so exciting. When Keren asked me, I was a bit nervous, and felt like I was about to faint, but when I was actually up there, it just felt natural. I wasn’t quite sure what to do in some parts, though. I think I was okay with the hand movements, but I didn’t do many fill-in bits or anything. So it didn’t go quite how I expected, but people still said it was really good. So yay! I still can’t believe it happened, somehow. But there you go. It happened!
Some chick friends and I are going to see Madagascar tonight! That will be fun. I haven’t actually been out with people without my husband for ages (well, there was Peta’s hens night last Friday night, but other than that). But it should be fabulous.
Okay, I’m going now. Don’t forget that I’m posting BIG on Monday! Stay tuned!
Sadness.
The only people I feel I can really talk to are my husband and my Mum.
Sorry I haven't been around lately. I've had a lot on my plate... I promise I'll post big next Monday.
The interviewee: Kristy.
Kristy, because I love you, and because you asked me, here are your interview questions.
1. If you could be anywhere in the world
right now, where would you be?
2. If you had to choose a man with only
one of these qualities (and none of the others), which one would it be? Brains, Looks, Humour, Kindness, Money.
3. What is your favourite animal, and why?
4. Where do you see yourself in five years?
5. If you had to eat from
only one restaurant every day (every meal) for a year, which one would you choose?
Thank you, Kristy, for being so enthusiastic about this interview thing. I’m sorry it took me so long to get back to you. :o) Oh, and please leave a comment when your answers are up on your blog. Yay!
Free money and frantic cleaning.
I am in the process of finding out how to sell my shares. Yes, I have shares! They were given to me by the company I used to work for. But I’m selling them because I don’t know a thing about shares, don’t know a thing about the stockmarket, and have no interest in learning either.
Another huge bonus to their demise is this: when the shares are finally out of my hair, I will most likely be around $400 richer! A nice, big sum of money for free. I like the sound of that. It could not come at a better time, believe me!
So now I’m waiting for the registrar place to send me some form to fill out, that says “Yes, I really own these shares!”, then I have to fill out another form from some stockbroker dude, then he said it’ll take about three weeks for the money to come through. I’m fine with that! Take three months, or three years for all I care! I get free money! I’m so very excited!
On a more sombre note, my husband’s parents are coming to stay with us this weekend. Ooops, that’s a good thing. Here is the sombre part: our house is a mess, and we have to madly clean everything between 5:30 and 7:30 tonight, so that we can pick them up from the airport at 8:30. We honestly thought their plane came in at 9:30, which would mean we had one more hour, but ‘tis not the case. So either we throw all of our junk in the spare room and hubby and I sleep in the living room, or we somehow, miraculously get everything done and we get to sleep in the spare room (the second option is preferred). People, we need prayer. Help!
Tagged.
I’ve been tagged by the lovely
Amber. Okay, here we go.
What's in your reading corner?Ummm, nothing. I don’t have a reading corner. I guess the place I read most often would be in bed. But we have a huge closet, with this step/seat thing in it, that I would LOVE to turn into a prayer and reading closet. But at the moment it is filled with clothes (and probably always will be).
Total number of books I have owned.I’d say about 200 or so.
The last book I bought.I think it was The Narrow Road by Brother Andrew and Jars Of Clay.
The last book I read.As above.
Currently reading...Big Girls Don’t Whine, by Jan Silvious. Yes, I needed this book. :o)
5 books that mean a lot to me.1. First Person Plural by Dr Cameron West. I was obsessed with this book for quite a while. It started off my fascination with psychology, and delving into the human mind. It is truly one of the most interesting books ever.
2. Boy Meets Girl by Joshua Harris. Before I started going out with my now-husband, I used this book as a basis for what our relationship would be like. I made a list of things a guy would have to do before I would consider becoming his girlfriend, and reading Boy Meets Girl was one of them. Sure, he
still hasn’t finished it… I may have kinda overlooked that point.
3. The Veritas Conflict by Shaunti Feldhahn. This book really gave some great answers to questions that would be asked by non-Christians, about the Christian faith. I found it very useful in being able to explain why we believe in certain things. I ended up sending it to a non-Christian friend, in hopes that she would read it and find the answers helpful. And it is an awesome novel about spiritual warfare. I couldn’t put it down.
4. The Narrow Road by Brother Andrew and Jars Of Clay. I couldn’t really
relate to this book, per se (about a missionary smuggling Bibles into countries where they’re forbidden), but I was always completely AMAZED with the provision of God in this man’s life. Whenever he needed anything, he put his trust in God, and God always gave him exactly what he was looking for. Not only money and material things, but God also ‘blinded’ the customs officers who were searching his car upon entry to a country. The trunk could have been filled with Bibles, but they wouldn’t even see anything! It was awesome.
5. The Bible. Agreed, the Bible is awesome. God is awesome. :o)
Tag 5 people, and have them fill this out on their blogs...What about just one? Okay,
Kristy , you’re it!
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Ha ha! I stood up to a telemarketer! Well, not
exactly a telemarketer, more like a telephone survey person. She wanted to do a survey on holiday habits. I said “I don’t have the time at the moment, sorry.” Then she said “It’ll only take a couple of minutes” and I was all like “No, I’m quite busy at the moment.” She said “So can I do the survey?” (keeping in mind that it was probably outsourced, as she had a very strong accent, which may have been a perfectly good excuse not to understand what I was saying). I said “No, I said I’m busy.” We said our goodbyes.
See? It was only a survey chick, but I set a benchmark for future encounters with
real telemarketers! I’m happy. :o)
Pizza.
My favourite type of pizza is not from
Pizza Hut or
Dominos, or even from any authentic Italian pizza place… it’s from the frozen foods section of the supermarket. Mmmmm,
Papa Giuseppi’s Supremo Frozen Pizza. Oh my goodness, it is SOOOOO good.
The interview.
Beth from
An Imperfect Life interviewed me. Here are my responses. If you want to be interviewed, please see the instructions at the bottom of this post. :o)
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1. The question that won't go away: You are a superhero. Choose three superpowers, a costume and a theme song. My first superpower would be reading peoples’ minds. In total agreement with Beth, it’d have to be only at will. Sure, it would be scary to find out what people really think of me, but also empowering (or depressing, depending on how many people like me).
Second, flying. I’ve always wanted to fly. When I was in grade 2, my friend Michelle came over to play. We’d jump off of the bench outside, and pretend that we could fly. We’d tell my brother (then 5) that we could only do it when he wasn’t watching.
Thirdly, the ability to breathe underwater. Another grade 2 story: Michelle and I used to pretend we were mermaids. Like all the time. Understandable, since I think that was the year The Little Mermaid came out. But man, I was obsessed. I even changed the words to the song ‘Part Of Your World’. I sang “I wanna be where the mermaids are, I wanna see, wanna see them swimming…”
My costume… definitely no spandex! Ooooh, I know how I’d have my hair! On the weekend I did it in a high ponytail, with a white ribbon wrapped around it, all medieval like, except not. Anyway, it was really cool. So something non-spandexy, with semi-medieval hair.
My theme song would be ‘She’s Like The Wind’ by Patrick Swayze. I’ve been thinking about that song a lot lately, about how very cool it is. It really fits with the whole flying thing, too.
2. What do you now know about marriage that you didn't know before getting married?Before you get married, you hear this: Things are really exaggerated in marriage - all your husband’s little quirks that you thought were cute, will just become annoying. And oh, they do. BUT, they didn’t tell me that
everything would be exaggerated. Our friendship, our love for each other, our bond, his understanding and protectiveness. I also know him so much better, so I can quite easily cheer him up when he’s feeling down, and vice versa. I didn’t know how much of a blessing marriage would be to my life.
3. When shopping, what color do you find yourself repeatedly drawn to, and why?At the moment, I’m probably attracted to the more ‘classic’ shades, like black, white, and brown. I think. You know, it’s been so long since I’ve been clothes shopping for myself! But if I did go shopping, I’m pretty sure that’s what I’d pick.
4. What would you like to be doing in your life in five years?I want to be a mother! Maybe I’ll even have two children by then! And I want to be a worship-leader, and live my life as an awesome, Godly example to others.
5. What pair of shoes in your closet is getting the most wear these days and why?Lately, I’ve been wearing my black lace-up Colorados (
like these ones) a lot. They’re the only closed black shoes I have, and since it’s winter, I can’t wear my open sandal type ones anymore.
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For anyone who wants to play, here are the Official Interview Game Rules: 1. If you want to participate, leave a comment saying "interview me."
2. I will respond by asking you five questions. Each person's questions will be different.
3. Update your journal/blog with the answers to the questions.
4. Include this explanation and an offer to interview others in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, ask them five questions.
